This Halloween, I Have the Power--VIDEO POWER

Video Power.

For those who don't know what I'm talking about, that's my Halloween costume for this year.

Because after Ug and Anal Bleed Poof, you can really only go with “Video Power.”

For those who still don't know what I'm talking about, I recommend you go back in time and check out a fine television game show with this name. In it, highly velcro-ed kids would wander through a maze, grabbing video games off of various walls and sticking them to the velcro, ermmmm, power suits. If the made it through the slide at the end of the “maze”, they would get to keep ALL the games stuck to them and even had the possibility of winning a Sega Genesis (with THREE buttons).

Now, this was a great show, but for some reason very few people remember it. Probably only me, and the guy who played “Johnny Arcade” even know of its existence. And I'm certain I remember the rules and regulations better than that putz. Like he probably doesn't remember the episode where after getting through the maze, the kid starts jumping up and down, ostensibly celebrating, but actually taking games from the wall and adding them to his vest. I remember that.

But therein lies a potential problem with my costume—few people are going to remember the show. As I said last week, I am for getting three percent of people to recognize my Halloween costumes. And if only me and a guy who probably OD'd on Pixie Stix are the only ones who remember, that leaves little for recognition.

Compounding matters, there were actually two vastly different seasons of Video Power. The game show season was actually the second season. The first version was basically a cheap knock off of “Captain N and the Game Masters,” without the big name licenses like Mega Man or Mother Brain. There's a very select crowd of people who, when I mention I'm a guy from Video Power, will say “You're not Tyrone, the foul-mouthed Arch Rivals character!”

That's very true. But I'm comforted by the fact that anyone THAT into the minuteae of crappy 90s cartoons probably isn't very cool. Definitely not as cool as me, proponent of early 90s game shows.

My end all statement to stop people questioning me will be to rip a game off my vest and say “This is what Alleyway looked like!” The complete non-sequitor will derail any sort of argumentative momentum they might have, and I'll be able to Video Power off into the sunset.

One of the key aspects of my costume construction is I must be able to make it myself for about $20. Luckily, the Video Power costume is relatively simple. Get a vest, stitch on patches of yellow velcro and then glue red and yellow velcro onto a bike helmet. Costume complete.

I might not achieve the three percent recognition target I strive to achieve, because this costume is even more esoteric than something like “Mr. Bananagrabber,” but I figure just about everyone will agree with a costume taken from a show that involves both velcro and video games. How could they not?

Finally, this costume will be so good, I'm certain Mr. Johnny Arcade himself will reward me with a Genesis. In fact, I know it... but then again, I suppose I'm putting “Johnny on the Spot.”