Thursday, June 7, 2012

My Privacy is Important, So I'm on Social Media

Facebook Privacy Notice

PRIVACY NOTICE: Warning - any person and/or institution and/or Agent and/or Agency of any governmental structure including but not limited to the United States Federal Government, James Bonds, Eskimos and Eskimo Pie makers, also using or monitoring/using this website or any of its associated websites, you do NOT have my permission to utilize any of my profile information nor any of the content contained herein including, but not limited to my photos, my abstract theories on Chalupa strategy (eat it), Ponzi schemes, and/or the comments made about my photos or any other "picture" art posted on my profile. It goes without saying this includes my collection of vintage Grover Cleveland Zombie erotica.

Feel free to publicize my anti-Spork rants though. This is the tine for our voice to be heard on that issue.

You are hereby notified that you are strictly prohibited from disclosing, copying, wagging a finger at, distributing, mimeographing, disseminating, tipping the hat, dissecting, mocking, or taking any other action against me with regard to this profile and the contents herein—this especially applies to the pictures of heroin, just because I find it punny. The foregoing prohibitions also apply to your employee, agent, student, secret agent, mistress, Don Draper, or any personnel under your direction or control.

Violators will be shot. Survivors will have their wounds tended to in a kind and caring fashion. It will be a long and painful recovery process, but together we'll look forward to the day when we can shoot big smiles at each other, have a laugh and I'll send you on your way before shooting you in the back and finishing the job I should I have done four years ago.

The contents of this profile are private and legally privileged and confidential information. Please note the lack of “air quotes” around privileged. Yeah, it's actual privilege. The violation of my personal privacy is punishable by stoning. UCC 1-103 1-308 (You sunk my Battleship) ALL RIGHTS RESERVED WITHOUT PREJUDICE

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